Capture the explosive feeling of achieving your goals.

With a new family, it’s easy to get caught up in day-to-day events and forget about the long-term planning and preparation that is crucial part of your success. Here are three important tasks that you need to move to the top of your “to-do” list.

Plan: Make a long-term financial plan

Regardless of your situation, a financial plan should help you identify goals that are important to you. If you’re not well versed in the financial sector, consult with a professional to determine the benefits of a Registered Retirement Savings Plan (RRSP), a Tax Free Savings Account (TFSA) and non-registered investing as well as money for your children’s education through a Registered Education Savings Plans (RESP.)

How you allocate money, what you invest in and your financial goals are personal. The plan must fit your family needs – not the perceived demands of society, neighbors or friends. A good plan starts with your current situation (net worth, income, expenses) and then helps you plot a path to your end goals (beachside condo, volunteering, travel, etc.) Explore all of your options, speak open and honestly with your spouse and children and make a plan that works for you.

Provide: Create your Will, Personal Directives and Power of Attorney

Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible. – Anthony Robbins

When you’re first starting out it may seem odd to spend time and money planning for what happens when you’re 100 years old. It’s not! The Will, Power of Attorney and Personal Directives for both my Wife and I cost less than $900 and took no more than 3 hours – a small price to pay to know that my children and estate will be taken care of according to my wishes.

These three documents go far beyond just providing for your family in case of an accident or emergency. Creating them offers you an opportunity to discuss important topics such as: identifying legal guardians for your children, charitable donations, family trusts or investment allocation plus issues of capacity and religious belief. Without clear and conscious decisions on all different types of issues, many of these may be left up to the courts. Get these documents created early, review them annually and revise them as needed.

Protect: Insurance for you and your income

Having the right insurance products are crucial to ensure the ongoing success of your family should you not be there to support them. Each of the previous two steps will not matter if you leave your family saddled with debt or unable to pay bills. Again, insurance needs are personal and the decision should be made after careful analysis of your requirements with the assistance of a professional.

In my case, I factored in the following: mortgage value, employment life and disability coverage, outstanding debts (credit card, line of credit or car loans), future educational needs for my children, time off for my spouse, childcare and funeral costs. Create your own list; factor in forseeable expenses then figure out the correct product mix for you.

It may seem like a daunting task trying to fit all of this into an already overloaded family schedule. The first step is to resolve to set aside time to get these completed. Ask friends for referrals or use social media – Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn – and get one meeting set per month. Within 90 days, you will have taken one giant step towards securing the success of your family finances.

This article was originally written for and posted by Des Nwaerondu at AdvisorDes.com (Twitter: @advisordes)

5 Steps for Changing a Negaitve Pattern

Initiation
Over the Canada Day long weekend, I was listening to Anthony Robbins‘ Get the Edge audio program once again. Although I didn’t know at the time, I accidentally had my iPod on random which resulted in a very interesting order of the chapters. I started out from the beginning, but quickly jumped into a section about changing your pattern and identifying new behaviors. (Don’t worry, I did figure it out fairly quickly!)

One great example he had was of a person who changed their concept of food – identifying it simply as fuel for the body rather than purely for pleasure – and lost over 100 pounds in the process. Closer to home, one of my good friends has recently taken up running resulting in the loss of over 60 pounds. Amazing results from a small mind change.

Motivation
For years I have enjoyed playing competitive sports so I recently signed up to join our corporate team in both Soccer (see my Monday Night Soccer Series) and Ultimate Frisbee. Last year, when I joined the team, it was extremely difficult play while feeling out of shape. I simply wasn’t performing at a high level. With this in mind, and adding further inspiration from my brother, I decided that it was time to add something more into my own life.

Identification
With a new motivation and using what I had heard in the audio program, I set out to get back into game shape. Often times on the weekend, I would come home and laziness would hit me. I would get really tired and be unable to concentrate (or even hold my eyes open.) My first instinct was to hit the couch, throw my arm up over my eyes and have a nice long sleep. Although it felt great, it sure wasn’t very motivating and actually drained my energy. There it was, I had identified one specific behavior – the afternoon nap – as an unproductive action that needed to change.

This one change has changed weak time into powerful, motivating time. It’s a simple replacement but an important first step.

Replacement
I decided to replace that feeling of lazy sleepiness by doing the opposite. I added energy through running. Now, when I get the urge to lay down and rest, I turn it back around, go upstairs, put on my shoes and go for a run. Although I’ve started small, no more than 2 to 3 km, I know it’s just a starting point. Although I wouldn’t call it a habit yet, seeing how much better I feel and knowing how easy it is will help make this a regular part of my routine.

Support
One big difference with this pattern change is that I’ve involved all of my family. With the support of my wife and kids, all it takes is one look from any of them and I’m shifted away from my old behavior and into my workout clothing. I’m actually looking forward to the day that my mind goes to running when I’m tired rather than straight to the couch.

Final thoughts
Making a change like this seems very difficult at first; however, once I realized that it was simply a replacement of a negative behavior with a positive one the transition seemed much easier. Even better, at one time, unless I set the timer, my naps could last 30 minutes to over an hour. Now, I’m able to go and run for anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes – saving time in the process – and make a huge positive influence in my health and in my life.

Go back through the list that I’ve just written, identify one negative action that’s wasting your time or not benefiting you physically or mentally. Next look for something that you really want to achieve, and make the swap. Just a little bit every day will make huge difference.

Chosing a personal coach or business coach to help you on your path

Know Where You Are
The perfect starting point in a coaching relationship is for you to have a solid understanding of your situation. Is it a business problem, a personal or relationship problem or are you stuck on something in your career? What is it that has motivated you to find a coach in the first place? If the coach knows your background, your industry or issues relating to your problem it may help them work through a solution with you.

Know Where You Want To Be
Like setting any goals, you need to have the end result in mind. Although a coach can help you explore areas of personal development, it is up to you to know what a successful coaching relationship is for you. What outcomes do you want? Is this something that is going to be a long term or short-term relationship? How will you know when you have achieved your goal? In the end, the only person who knows whether the relationship has worked as you. Coaching is an excellent way to get help moving from “A to B” but, you have to have an idea about what “B” looks like first.

Know What You Need To Get There
Before you hire your coach, you must determine your coaching needs. This means you should have an idea of how a coach can best support you. It may be that you simply need an independent person to hear your story or someone who will hold you accountable to your promises or targets. It may also be that you need someone to help you get unstuck in a personal or business problem. A good coach will change how they react to you as the relationship grows; however, knowing what you need will make your coach more effective during your time.

Final Word
A coaching relationship can help you work through your problems with greater speed and efficiency; however, the nature of the relationship is really up to you as the client. By following these three easy steps, you will enhance your coaching sessions, increase their effectiveness and heighten their value.

Charles Darwin

The connections in my brain started to fire and an idea simply popped into my head. Creativity at it’s best!

Finding your creativity
In my case, it was a change of mind-set that brought on my break-through. Other times, exploring a new part of the city, walking in a different park or reading something outside of my normal interests makes the difference.

If you’re looking for a breakthrough in your own area, try changing your approach. In fact, try making drastic changes to what you’re thinking and doing. If you’re working on a marketing problem, flip through some operational or mathematics books at the library. If you’re stuck on a blog post, try creating a mind-map, free writing or doodling about your topic. You really never know what’s going to make a new connection and take you in a new, amazing direction!

In my experience, ideas come from everywhere, at any time and without warning. That’s why I always carry either my main notebook journal (where everything goes) or my trusty 3X4 inch index card. When an idea comes, it gets written down. We all know how hard it is to generate a great idea, make sure it’s not lost.

Final Comment
Sometimes taking a break from your project and simply letting your mind wander is the best way to create your next big idea. Change the scenery, talk to people about where you’re stuck and get moving.

Where I was on July 24, 2010

When I was younger, the first step was to find the proper time to set goals. While most people would choose New Years Eve, I would try something different. Sometimes it would be at the start of a new school year. It may be my birthday, a long summer weekend or even extended weekends in winter or spring. The interesting thing about this is that I always seemed to chose a holiday or some other “event” to plan my future from. Inevitably, something else would come up and I would then have to wait until the next vacation to plan – remember, planning only happens on special days!

As you can guess, the results were usually less than complete. I would end up with a half finished planning pyramid, timeline or list and then set it aside. Of course, over the years I got better at setting goals and then following through (trying anyways) but planning always waited for a holiday.

Things change
Recently, I had the opportunity to watch Life In a Day on Netflix. As a social experiment, the filmmakers posed a few simple questions and asked people to film their replies (or any other part of their day.) The only criteria was that it all had to be filmed on July 24, 2010.

The result was over 4500 hours of footage that was cut and edited into a 2 hour movie. Great show and worth the watch.

The change came to me early on in the film as I thought more about their criteria. July 24, 2010 didn’t seem to be any particularly special day but the film combined elements from around the world to show all the greatness out there. It showed happiness, pain, success, failure and everything in between.

Like opening a great wine, waiting for a perfect time to set goals doesn’t exist. Try combining them! Create a special event for yourself.

My life
To me, it was a true testament to the fact that any day can be great. It really hit home the idea that life exists between weekends and holidays. The greatest moments in your life don’t necessarily happen due to planning, rather, they come out of nowhere when you least expect it.

One big positive effect of watching this movie and reflecting on the subject is in my goal setting and planning. I’ve made a much stronger effort to have the process be more fluid. I now realize that a spending time shaping my future is the event and worth celebrating.

A sample of my free writing

The free writing technique is implemented by writing fast and continually without worrying about proper punctuation, spelling, structure, topic or form. It’s an exercise of writing everything that comes to mind without reservation and is a great way to get ideas onto paper extremely quickly without being encumbered by analysis or over thinking. Free writing allows people to reach a level of thinking that goes beyond those that they have through the course of a normal day.

Here are six ways that the free writing technique will improve your writing:

1. Increases Your Creativity
The act of continuous non-stop writing forces your mind to come up with new ideas. Getting these on paper then allows the creative juices in your brain begin to flow. With free writing, the stream of ideas that must be generated will move you through all different topics. The right brain will kick in trying to come up with new areas to explore.

2. Generates New Ideas
Going beyond creativity, you simply do not know what’s buried in your brain until you give this technique a chance. Without the ability to fall back into your regular thought pattern (because of the speed of the task) you’ll generate ideas that you never thought were possible or never thought that you would (or could) have. Free writing helps you to bring new ideas to the surface that may have been hiding in the back of your mind.

Free writing allows you to work through your own issues – without resorting to negativity or complaining.

3. Gets You Unstuck
Whenever you’re stuck in a situation, this technique can help you blast right through that feeling, opening new possibilities and concepts. Whether you’re stuck on a writing project, business plan or in your personal life, getting a stream of ideas down will help move you past the block.

4. Makes You Feel Great!
One of the biggest challenges to a writer is come up with something new and original every time — adding value to the reader. Once complete, this method of idea generation allows you to sit back and review a whole range of different thought directions. Most times, you will amaze yourself with a level of creativity and the sheer volume of material just by pushing yourself. It’s a powerful feeling to reflect on a successful free writing session.

5. Forces You to Think Differently
One of the biggest problems is the regurgitation of your own ideas. Every writer or blogger has “fallen into a rut” where your topic seems to be similar no matter what you try to write. Free writing forces your mind to think in different ways outside of your normal. Like using a mind map, it helps you to explore different ideas from different points of view and make connections that never existed before.

6. Creates a Chain Reaction of New Thoughts
It is often surprising how quickly you get focused on getting the words written down. As ideas come, all it takes is one slight deviation to your thought pattern and your writing goes in an entirely new direction. You may start with getting ideas for a new blog post and end up writing the first paragraph of your next novel!

Free writing is one of the most useful tools for generating ideas, getting unstuck or increasing your creativity level. It can be done in very little time and forces you to think in new and exciting ways. If you’ve never tried free writing, start with a small topic in mind, set a time limit then get writing and let your mind explore.

At first, it took me by surprise. It’s not because my birthday is a secret or anything like that. No, it was mainly due to the fact that my Birthday is not for another 4 months!

Apparently, the nephew of our Director is also named Ryan and this lead to an impromptu celebration for my big day. Of course, playing up the role (and never turning down a free lunch) we all enjoyed the humor – and the free food.



Turn Life’s Events Into a Celebration

As I sat at the table wondering what type of presents I wasn’t going to get, I realized how much I was enjoying the group and lunch. That also made me think about all the time you spend in life moving from one moment to the next and not celebrating!

When was the last time that you celebrated your life?

Was this a particularly special day for any reason?

No.

Did a random mistake make me feel pretty special for a little while?

YES!

Create Your Own Special Events

To pay forward the fun of an impromptu day, here are some other ideas for adding some variety to your life and making someone else feel great in the process:

Celebrate an Unbirthday
Mark your calendar on a random day then grab your friends and treat someone to lunch. Pick one of those people in your office that you may have never had the chance to know but always wanted to.

Get to know each other
Get a few of your close colleagues together and plan to have a “getting to know you” party. Ask questions that go beyond the surface – favorite sports team, vacation spots or television shows – and really find out about your friends.

Sample Questions

1. Are you Superstitious? Give and Example.
2. When you have no immediate concerns, where does your mind wander?
3. What books are you reading these days?
4. What do you consider your best quality?
5. When are you most comfortable or at ease with yourself?
6. What’s the most important thing about you
7. If you could spend one hour doing anything what/where would it be?

Have a “Conspiracy Theory Party”
I once threw a Conspiracy Theory Party over a couple of lunch hours at work. All it took was a few minutes on YouTube to find some great videos on Aliens, Government cover-ups and all sorts of other fascinating (and off the wall) things.
Get Popcorn, order pizza and enjoy.

My favorites (and those safe for office use):

• Aliens living on Mars/origins
• Aliens living on the moon
• Fake moon landing
• New World Order
• Illuminati

Volunteer
Nothing can possible make people feel more connected than spending time together helping others. I don’t care if you just walked out of a shouting match with a colleague, serving food at a shelter or sorting food for a Food Bank will mend wounds and bring people together.

Of course, this is just a start. Have fun with it! Also, please post a comment if you have an idea for the list…

In honor of the day, enjoy:

Riding the train to downtown each day gives me loads of time to think about life and read about business. Recently, I picked up a book that I have been meaning to read for a long time: The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma. Originally, I had Sharma’s book The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari in my hands but LWT (Lead Without a Title) spoke to me a little louder!

Recently, I seem to have read books that have a “story” format like The Wealthy Barber, The Celestine Prophesy and Life’s Golden Ticket (each good books in their own ways.)

Short Summary

The Leader Who Had No Title follows the story of Blake who is a young Gulf War Veteran trying to find his way in the world. Through the bookstore that he works (who hasn’t dreamed of doing this one) he meets Tommy – an eccentric top performer within the organization. Tommy takes Blake to visit his own mentors Ana, Ty, Jackson and Jet who teach Blake about the LWT philosophy.

Using a series of acronyms SPARK, IMAGE, HUMAN and SHINE (see below), the four mentors and Tommy bring Blake from an individual who can’t see past the daily grind of the workplace into a true “everyday leader.”

The main point is that it’s not a title that gives you leadership ability. Specifically, you should not wait to get a leadership title to be a leader. Leadership comes from the belief that your role is important, you are proud of yourself and want to succeed.

A genius idea alone has zero value. What makes it priceless is the quality of follow-through and the speed of execution around the genius idea.” (pg 73)

Why it spoke to me

This book had a great effect on my own position within the organization that I work. Everyday, I have the opportunity to either push one step forward or, alternatively, be negative and move everyone a step back. Let’s be clear, it’s not like I don’t know the correct answer for this – stay positive! Sometimes it just takes another boost of motivation to set you back on the right path.

The second great thing that I came to realize is that being a leader is far more than just the title. Even within your own personal relationships – home, friends, colleagues – the ideas in this book apply to each of those.

Action Steps

To sum it all up, I would recommend this book as a nice easy read with great quotes and key-points. I don’t think that the story kept me as involved as some other story format books (where you learn as they learn) but I finished it in a few days and have gone back a few times to read some key points.

Here are a few action steps and key quotes I’ve taken from the book:

“If you want to win, you need to help others win. And part of that is doing all you can do to build a high-performance culture within your organization.” (pg 136)

“…become more connected to those moments where your natural genius most fully presents itself. Live for those moments and you’ll begin to experience more of them.” (pg 69) – see Marcus Buckingham for lots more on Playing To Your Strengths.

“He never caught a glimpse of the leader he could have been. So he kept on working and living exactly the same way. No reaching. No venturing. No expanding….All because he just wouldn’t dare to leave his comfort zone.” (pg 100)

“…spending even five minutes during that first hour of your day celebrating all the good things in your life will put you into an acute state of happiness.” (pg 183)

The Acronyms

IMAGE
Innovation
Mastery
Authenticity
Guts
Ethics

SPARK
Speak with Candor
Prioritize
Adversity Breeds Opportunity
Respond versus React
Kudo’s for Everyone

HUMAN
Helpfulness
Understanding
Mingle
Amuse
Nurture

SHINE
See Clearly
Health is Wealth
Inspiration Matters
Neglect Not Your Family
Elevate Your Lifestyle

I’ve also found a few other blogs who reviewed this book:

Rob Christeson of RobChristeson.com recommends this book for people who don’t believe that they can make a difference in their everyday lives. Read his book review for The Leader Who Had No Title.

Perry Holley at PerryHolley.com says that “The Leader Who Had No Title” is for each and every one of us, regardless of position or title, to develop how we lead ourselves so that we positively influence as many people as possible in our day to day life. Read his review on this book by Robin Sharma

As promised via twitter during the event earlier today – and taking a quick piece of advice from the speaker Chris Garrett (@chrisgarrett or chrisg.com) – I created my own Top Ten ideas from the Social Media Breakfast Calgary #29.

During the event, Mark (@yycmortgageguy) asked me to: “Try a top 9 or 11.5 to be different and create an interesting list.”

So here it is, my Top Ten list as numbered in binary and some tweets that I liked as well.


1
Having the opportunity to share ideas by meeting a whole bunch of great Calgary Bloggers and Social Media Professionals in one place!

10
People do not like to be sold to (or should we say sold at?) Interruption marketing is an old and unpleasant way to do business. The new model is based on getting permission and then, once the interest and acceptance is achieved, convert them into a fan and customer.

@LauraArbuthnot
Instead of interrupting people, attract people. Make what you do relevant to them and then they’ll take action #smbyyc

11
People need to know your story or something more interesting than a simply fact sheet. If you’re trying to sell value, make sure that they can relate to you, your product or the company.

@that_angela
Before you start any content marketing efforts, know what your story is and know how you want to tell it. #smbyyc

100
Starting to look at everything you write or produce from the point of view of the customer. What are their interests? If they want higher Internet speed and better HDTV, don’t spend money trying to sell them on the benefit of a long distance plan.

@ssllee
“Talk to your customers. What u think they want could be different than what they actually want.”@chrisgarrett Agreed!!! #smbyyc

101
Learning more about Google’s new page rank/SEO metrics: they want to know the neighborhood you play in. That means that you need quality links (not bought – never bought!) from equally trustworthy sources.

@Hilary_tweets
Google also has trust issues (so make sure your online ‘neighborhood’ and reputation are positive ones)! @chrisgarrett #smbyyc

110
The importance of building trust with your readers and customers. It’s not just about giving them loads of text; they need to trust the information you’re providing and then want even more.

@LaurenHerschel
Not enough just to be visible. You need to establish like and trust #smbyyc

111
It’s impossible to control what people say about you. The best defense is to ensure that you’ve created the venue or a forum for them to give feedback that you can respond to. This also means that you don’t simply ignore the bad and promote the good – turn it all into an opportunity.

@oMargoto
Give people a place to air their grievances where you can hear it and respond. #smbyyc And make sure you do something about it.

1000
Getting back to basics is important for keeping your market interested. Great content can’t be purchased for $10 an article and must be created for your market. Retweets and quotes are nice to read but original material is always going to get people engaging with you.

@kailicashin
Remember- content is the bread and butter of social media- @chrisgarrett #smbyyc

1001
Having someone ask the exact question I was thinking – thus saving me the trouble: How do you show the value of a social media campaign to people who are still thinking traditional advertising? (Thanks @jennahib)

And finally,

1010
Hearing about a mankini not once but twice in 60 minutes and knowing with 100% certainty that I won’t hear about that again for at very long time.

No tweet here although I’ll give a shout out to @chrisgarrett and @kevinhayesca!

Make sure to follow me @ryanlewislive too!

Can you operate at a peak level? Surround yourself with A level people

Soaring with Eagles
A friend of mine has always had great ‘luck’ in her career. She was recruited early, ended up as a leader in her group, was re-recruited for a new leadership position and then promoted again. Next, came the transfer to a higher position and now is regularly meeting amongst some of her previous colleagues in an ongoing high-level leadership group. Wow.

I have always called her an All-Star, but I realized that it’s much more than just her skills that bring this level of success. When she was first recruited, her mentor was a person who played at an ‘A’ level and surrounded herself with ‘A’ people. The next big move up was initiated by another ‘A’ player who also gathered others with similar characteristics and drive. This type of pattern isn’t an accident and her high achievement isn’t either.

When a person is surrounded by top performers, they will almost always have a greater opportunity to shine. Although positions and careers are different, when great people gather, great things happen! (Just check out a TED event) It has a compounding effect on more than just the job output. These groups multiply ideas, motivation, drive, goals and dreams. More importantly, it helps create new grand ideas for what success means to the individual.

Make your own luck
If your workplace has this type of environment then you’re already ahead of the game. If not, then it’s you who must take the first step towards the goal. You must embrace a consistent yet targeted way of moving through a career – not only being attracted and surrounding yourself with peak performance but, even more importantly attracting other peak performers to you.

If you’re not getting to this level at work, then it’s time to do a review of your goals. Of course, another option is to get out in the community and find yourself a group of people who do great things. Volunteer or form a group of like-minded people. Remember, it’s up to you – no one will do it for you.

In a previous post Do You Know Your Strengths? I began my journey of focusing on what supercharges me. With this in mind, I can find the right people (at work and outside of work) who can partner with me in achieving the highest level of success.